Starting a Business but Paralyzed by Fear of Failure?
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Yes, entrepreneurship, starting a business, it looks and sounds amazing. You can set your schedule, you can take trips anywhere you want, you will finally have free time, you can get rid of all the financial stress, and you’ll be so much happier.
WHOA, WAIT! Sorry to burst your bubble, but although these things are possible, they DO NOT come easy or at the beginning. Although I am a true believer in anything being possible, I also believe in being honest and sometimes that includes the hard truth.
Oftentimes we see the entrepreneurs we look up to living the good life, and we wish we were there with them. What we don’t always see are the struggles they experienced to get there. The stress, worries, doubts, late nights, and tears.
Running your own business is hard work. It is not a job you come home to after a long day where you can forget it and unwind. As a business owner, you take worries and doubts home with you.
If you want to start a business, just go into it knowing fully it will be hard, there will be challenges to overcome and you will have to face your doubts. Often, more than you expect. It will not be an easy road to travel, more like a crazy rollercoaster that has bumps and loops everywhere.
But here comes the good stuff. Being an entrepreneur can also have huge rewards. If you can find a business idea that suits you and navigate the crazy path it can be extremely fulfilling and rewarding. You can create the life you want; traveling, helping people, being financially free, and being in control of your own time. The pride and confidence in overcoming obstacles will make your spirit soar.
If you made it this far and weren’t scared off by hearing the challenges you will face then you’re off to a good start. You must have a big enough reason why!
That reason, your WHY, is the first step to overcoming any doubts that stand in your way.
The number one fear when starting a business and how to get through it
Fear of Failure
The most common fear when starting a business is a fear of failure. When I first decided to start my own business I was massively afraid of failing and how it would make me feel. How it would make me look, what would others think of me? What would my family think of me?
Then I came across a video of a commencement speech given by Jim Carey at a graduation ceremony in 2014. He said something powerful;
“You can fail at what you don’t love, so you might as well take a chance on doing what you love.” ~ Jim Carey
Well? It’s true. There is a chance of failure with everything we do, so why not try doing something we want to?
It’s a great quote, motivational and true. But then why, even believing that, did the fear of failing still stop me?
This fear stems from something deeper. When we are starting our own business we are putting our own beliefs on the line, we are putting our ideas out there, we are expressing our vulnerability and we are afraid that if we fail that we must not be good enough.
That’s bullcrap talking. Yet, there is this deep-rooted belief inside us that failure is a bad thing.
We are taught in school to get answers right or we get an ‘x’ on our homework. We are shown on social media that pictures must be perfect or no one will like them. All these things we see every day reinforce our belief that failing is bad.
Let’s change that now and start believing that failure is tied to success and without it, there wouldn’t be any.
The best and simplest example I can think of to show this is to remember a time when your mom or a loved one saw you fail. Or if you are a parent, think of a time when you saw your child fail (like falling off a bike). Now what would they have said to you and what would you say to your child?
You would say it’s ok, it’s part of learning and to get back on and try again.
Mic drop… lol. Seriously, we would never say the things we say to ourselves to someone else. That would be rude, hurtful, and just plain mean. So why are we saying these things to ourselves when we fail?
Tony Robbins said, “Failure is impossible.”
Yes. It is impossible if you keep trying and learning. You can’t fail if you never give up, you’re just learning what didn’t work.
How can I conquer my fear of failure?
First off, it all comes back to your WHY, that first step in overcoming any doubts in your mind.
Your WHY is your reason for starting a business. It is not surface-level, like wanting to make more money or wanting to be a boss. Your WHY is a feeling, an emotion, the reason why inside you feel like this is right for you.
Examples: You want to help your parents financially because they helped you your whole life. Maybe you want to give back to the community that helped you overcome your biggest challenges. It could be that you need more time with your family before time runs out.
These are your WHY. A reason that brings EMOTION to you, a reason that deep inside you know is more important than being afraid to try.
Come up with your WHY reason and it’ll be hard to let a fear of failing stop you from moving forward.
Once you have your powerful reason for choosing business as the path, consider the following to reinforce your passion and guide you away from fear.
- Realize that fear is normal and everyone starting experiences it
- There is ALWAYS something you can always learn from failing
- Forgive yourself. Don’t expect perfection and allow yourself to be a beginner.
- Surround yourself with people with similar goals and positive thinking
- Accept that fear is part of the process and can guide you to think through your decisions
Bouncing back after a business failure
Step 1 – Celebrate
You failed. CONGRATULATIONS! Celebrate, don’t dwell! Celebrate your failure because you tried and learned! Honestly, go out and treat yourself to anything! Grab a tea, get a new book to read to inspire yourself and learn something new (my favourite thing to do when I fail), or just high-five yourself in the mirror (thanks Mel Robbins).
I understand that you may not be in a frame of mind to congratulate yourself for failing but you need to find something positive in it. I don’t want you to think ‘OK, I have to be a total optimist,’ but you should find something positive that came out of the experience.
Start rewarding yourself for failing and trying. Rewire your brain to see the good that exists in failure.
Step 2 – Learn & Grow
Failure is not permanent, it is a chance to reflect, a time to learn and grow, and a time to challenge yourself. Collect yourself, take a deep breath, and get a pen and paper. Look back at what worked and what didn’t, then get ready to research and brainstorm new ideas to try.
Write down your WHY, and hang it up on your wall or paste it in front of your journal. Make sure when you feel like you are losing motivation and doubt is creeping back in that your reason is right there in your face. Write it from your heart, let it be long or short but write it down.
Step 3 – Repeat this step
Try again.
The path ahead
I began my journey into blogging in 2007, ages ago. But I wasn’t committed. I thought it was a good idea and so I dabbled but nothing came of it so I stopped and went to work at a job.
After my third child, I decided I didn’t want to go back to work for someone else anymore. So that left me working for myself and I decided on starting a business I dabbled in entrepreneurship in college, running a business, and enjoyed it. The variety, the people, the challenges. Of course not everything was great but overall I thought it was something I wanted to try again.
But, I failed. Then I failed again. The more I failed, the more I would read, the more stuck I got, the more I would research. Eventually, it begins to work. Eventually, things start to flow a little smoother.
Still, every day some fears and doubts enter my mind. There are things out of my control that can affect my business and things within my control. There is still so much I don’t know and that is challenging but if we don’t try, we will never get there.
“You miss 100% of the shots you don’t take.” ~ Wayne Gretzky
Don’t miss all your shots because you’re scared you might miss, if you take a shot, you might just score!
I hope you feel inspired to create the change that you want in your life. If you feel like you might want to start a business, don’t let the fear of failure stop you. Do the work, learn as much as you can, read, and start small. Research, find a role model, and be prepared for the bumpy road ahead. Plan what you can but be ready for surprises.
Most of all, believe in yourself!
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What To Say To Someone Who Failed – Know someone struggling or someone who is hard on themselves for failing at something. Read here for ideas on what to say (and not say) to help them.
